I don't remember a single day of my life, where i have not had a dream. A dream could as simple as, winning an oscar or as complicated as having a cute little baby and taking care of it for the rest of my life (or wait, is it other way around?) But, I have always had a dream. I used to talk to myself for hours and sort out every single thought that bothered me. Basically, I had a lot of "me" time and I used to enjoy it. Now, when I think of it, it used to keep me calm and help me do the right thing.
Life caught up with the pace it had to once i was exposed to a fast/competitive/career oriented world and i lost that touch with me. I stopped dreaming. I started living into the moment. which is fine, but I had no idea where the moment is leading to and I was OKAY with it! I stopped bothering. I can call it a phase or I can take the blame, the fact remains I changed. All of that ended with BIGGER and PAINFUL confusions. Confusions whose solution I have yet not found. Confusions which entered from which door and when, I have no idea about. Well, who was to blame! I justified everything with only one answer to myself - Well, when, if not now?
Now, I think, that phase is getting over. Day by day, I am getting my beliefs back, I am taking charge of the responsibilities I had given up. And that is happening because I am no more dependent on anyone for anything. Huh. Interesting! One can be as content as one wishes to when one is independent. One is focused. Well, I am trying to get that focus back. I am aiming higher for a better tomorrow. And I am doing all that for "ME". Mistakes, I am ok with, but repetition I won't be!
A mixed sort of a feeling goes through while typing this out. Not sure whether I am happy or upset!
Life caught up with the pace it had to once i was exposed to a fast/competitive/career oriented world and i lost that touch with me. I stopped dreaming. I started living into the moment. which is fine, but I had no idea where the moment is leading to and I was OKAY with it! I stopped bothering. I can call it a phase or I can take the blame, the fact remains I changed. All of that ended with BIGGER and PAINFUL confusions. Confusions whose solution I have yet not found. Confusions which entered from which door and when, I have no idea about. Well, who was to blame! I justified everything with only one answer to myself - Well, when, if not now?
Now, I think, that phase is getting over. Day by day, I am getting my beliefs back, I am taking charge of the responsibilities I had given up. And that is happening because I am no more dependent on anyone for anything. Huh. Interesting! One can be as content as one wishes to when one is independent. One is focused. Well, I am trying to get that focus back. I am aiming higher for a better tomorrow. And I am doing all that for "ME". Mistakes, I am ok with, but repetition I won't be!
A mixed sort of a feeling goes through while typing this out. Not sure whether I am happy or upset!
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